"I was just angry. I didn't mean what I said. Why do you take it so personally?"
"Just because I said those things doesn't mean you can't be a little more forgiving."
"I never intended to go at you that way. You triggered me with what you said. When you challenge me that way, I can't help myself."
"When you're hostile, it makes me get angry back. I wouldn't be that way if you weren't that way to me first."
"You're way too sensitive."
"You're exaggerating. I never said anything that bad."
"It doesn't matter if you didn't mean to, because you did hurt"
You're accountable for the pain you've caused whether you intended to or not